October 2010
29 posts
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“ I was always told on my driving test that if an animal steps out infront of my...”
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Unsettling Things to Hear from the Cockpit of a...
Gina Yashere: “Thank God we’re flying - I’m too pissed to drive.”
Frankie Boyle: “We’re about to experience a lot of turbulence, and then a lot of falling.”
Hugh Dennis: “Don’t panic, just think of it as landing more vertically than normal.”
Rory Bremner: “This is your captain speaking, we’re out at the moment, please leave...
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Exam questions that were rejected
Andy Parsons: “A lot of people say that the exams are too easy. Is the answer A: Yes or B: David Beckham.”
Hugh Dennis: “If the world’s temperature is rising at 2 degrees per decade, what is the point of anything?!”
Frankie Boyle: “Spell ‘Mississippi’, without looking at how we’ve spelt it in the question.”
Hugh Dennis: “Two cars...
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Lines that you'd never hear in a Bond film
Frankie Boyle: “Ingenious Q. It’s a bomb, but it’s also a rucksack.”
Hugh Dennis: (foreign feminine accent) “Oh James, what a wonderful present, chlamydia!”
Gina Yashere: “My name is Bond, Muhammad Bond!”
Frankie Boyle: “Everything’s ready for your mission, Bond. All you need to do is fill out this health and safety risk...
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What a TV chef would never say
Hugh Dennis: “So that’s the bird plucked and stuffed, now all that remains is to kill it.”
Andy Parsons: “And here, what you want to do is, put a little of the brownie mixture in the tin and then sprinkle a little bit of hash on the top of it.”
Hugh Dennis: “Well, these Korean meatballs really are the dog’s bollocks!”
Frankie Boyle: “If...
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The worst thing to hear over a tannoy system
Hugh Dennis: “Only you can hear me.”
Hugh Dennis: “Second floor… but you can’t get out.”
Russell Howard: [high-pitched voice] “Can somebody come to the salami slicer please?”
Mark Watson: “Ladies and gentlemen, we all know there will be a bomb on the tube, but will it be today?”
Hugh Dennis: “The lift doors are closing…...
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“Charlie: Oh shit. Look at that door dude. See that door right there? That door...”
– Its always sunny in Philadelphia. Best tv show ever made.
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“Mac: What in the hell is a MySpace page?
Dee Reynolds: It’s like that...”
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“When I get sad, I stop being sad, and be awesome instead… True...”
– Barney ~ himym
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“Barney: In my body, where the shame gland should be, there is a second awesome...”
– Barney ~ himym
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“Brick Tamland: I love… carpet.
[pause]
Brick Tamland: I love…...”
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“Brick Tamland: [opposing women in the newsroom] I read somewhere their periods...”
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“We can all relate to misunderstandings
We’re understanding now
With all the time...”
– 10th Street ~ Valencia
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Rejected lines from movies
Russell Howard: [in ET voice] “ET phone premium rate sex line!”
Frankie Boyle: “Milk? Bread? Rich Tea biscuits? Are you sure this is the right list, Mr Schindler?”
Andy Parsons: “There are 50,000 Zulu ouside. Now tell Jade to get back inside and keep her bloody mouth shut!”
Hugh Dennis: “This T1000 cybernetic organism has encountered a problem and...
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“There’s a lot that I don’t know
There’s a lot that I’m...”
– The Resolution ~ Jacks Mannequin
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Today I found out I really like gang vocals in songs after listening to set your goals and for year strong back to back. That’s all.
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full live sets of fireworks, the swellers and... →
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“Brian Fantana: No, she gets a special cologne… It’s called Sex...”
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I'm traveling from Glasgow to Manchester on Sunday. Its going to take about 4 hours. I love road trips. Why? Cause I get to make a 4 hour playlist.
Any suggestions for songs or albums?
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September 2010
65 posts
3 tags
